“You are not unique…”
I was about 12 when my Aunt. Jeannie said that to me. We were sitting at a diner in a two-seater while my Mom and my other Aunt sat at the table next to us.
It stung. I was going to say it kind of hurt, but it didn’t kinda hurt; it stung.
Aren’t your Aunts supposed to tell you that you’re special, one of a kind, unique?
Isn’t 12 hard enough? Feeling ugly and awkward… isn’t someone supposed to at least have the decency to lie to us and tell us we’re somehow special?
Well, my Aunt was not that kind of Aunt. She was the kind that brought healing to everyone she met. We often hear the expression, hurting people hurt. But that wasn’t her; she was on the other side of that- she was the person who we’re talking about when we say: healthy people heal.
Honesty IS the Best Policy
“Open rebuke is better than love carefully concealed.”Proverbs 27:5, NKJV
And although she was not rebuking me, she was addressing a fallacy that often gives us a false sense of security; that we are unique in our struggles and temptations. Removing that belief helped remove that stumbling block so that healing could begin.
No one is really unique. God has a specific plan for each of us, but we are all human, and our emotions, bodies, and souls all function the same way.
One Sentence That Changed My Life
My Aunt knew exactly what I needed when she sat across from me that day. I was scared all the time as a kid, and I actually thought I was an alien. (It’s okay to laugh, I can chuckle thinking about it now) As a kid, that seemed like the only logical explanation for why I felt so weird all the time. It’s like my body wasn’t my own; I felt trapped.
She told me, “Donna, you’re not unique. You are not the only one who feels this way. You’re not alone.”
It was like I turned a corner and could start to see a glimpse of light. It would be many years until I would start to feel any sort of peace, but for the first time in my life, I had hope that things could change.
I don’t remember exactly what we spoke about after that, but I know that it was a pivotal moment in my journey to healing.
You are not alone.
Anxiety can be so lonely. We all experience the same emotions and thoughts, but most people don’t talk about it, so we end up feeling like we’re the only ones.
We’re embarrassed because we feel like we’re too needy; we should just be able to get our act together, but we’re not the only ones- because, remember, we are not unique.
God Uses Our Trials to Heal Others
I think of where I was that day, and I thank God he delivered me from that life.
I thank God for using the trials my Aunt went through, the ways the enemy tried to destroy her, and how God used it for good.
Like when Joseph told his brothers who sold him into slavery,
“But as for you, ye thought evil against me; but God meant it unto good, to bring to pass, as it is this day, to save much people alive.”Genesis 50:20, NKJV
Healing IS Possible
I might not be able to sit across the table and look you in the face, but I’ll tell you the same thing my Aunt told me many years ago because I know it is true for you, too.
You are not unique. You are not the only one who feels this way. You are not alone.
If you don’t believe me, I understand.
But believe God’s word. Or I encourage you to meditate on it until you do.
“That which has been is what will be,
That which is done is what will be done,
And there is nothing new under the sun.”Ecclesiastes 1:9, NKJV
Whenever I feel low, like I don’t know how to get up, I think of my Aunt. Jeannie told me in the diner years ago, and I hope that her words of wisdom can be passed along to you, too.
Be patient with yourself and know that healing is a lifelong journey. Please know that it’s possible, you are capable, and you are worthy.
Do not hesitate to comment below with any questions or concerns.